Parkinsonneritis
Now, now! Tut, tut. Get a grip. I suspect you might be suffering from a touch of parkinsonneritis. Yes, you do. Not that it matters, but I hope you realise we all feel a little under the weather from time to time. I’m a complete wreck at times, yet I still manage to soldier on. Why don’t you take a nice, brisk walk? Will do you the world of good, all that fresh air. That’s what they tell people with depression and it helps them no end. Now, come on – a little rain never hurt anyone. Come on. Up and at ‘em!
I’ve seen bigger moons, declared my friend on our girlies’ night out in London. The distance between the earth and the moon was tiny that night. And it was a full moon, so it looked massive. My husband called from the Netherlands, to insist that we pop outside and take a peek. A once in a lifetime event, he said. He was right: it was colossal! Quite intimidating. Spooky, in fact. My friend was less impressed. She glanced at it nonchalantly, and declared: I’ve Seen Bigger Moons Than THAT!
You promised me a lot, Life. Happiness, success, a touch of fame, even if I didn’t know exactly what form that would take, a family with the love of my life, living to 100. Sooooo, can we take just a little moment to discuss, Life? That’s if you can tear yourself away from lining up yet more surprises? 
Who to call in the middle of the night, when you’re in despair? Who’s online even, at 03:00am? Now you know why I publish in your time zone, dear readers in the US, Canada and Australia. Joking.