If there’s one thing I find stressful, it’s spring. Especially when it’s nice weather. You can’t simply slob out in front of the telly, knock out a new column, read a book, or tidy out that cupboard you’ve been meaning to. No way, not in this weather. Totally Out of the Question. If you’re still in bed at 8am at the weekend in this weather, you already feel it coming. Spring stress.
You have to go outside
You have to go outside. And I don’t mean, just go outside. That wouldn’t be so bad. But you have to actually ENJOY it too. Your deck chairs are hiding somewhere in the back of the garage, the breeze still has an icy edge to it, and the garden is completely bare. But you’re going to go outside and enjoy it, no matter what. Even though you don’t have a springdressy to wear. Except for that old thing from last year, which you now wouldn’t be seen dead in …not that you’ve any intention of baring those milk bottle legs covered in winter stubble anyway. You don’t have any suitable shoes either. Only your fleece lined timberlands.
So there you are.
Sitting on a stool in your winterdressy, outside in the sun. Imagining other, more glamorous people, soaking up the rays in their fresh springdressy on a trendy terrace, with a chilled glass of wine and a packet of sea salt and balsamic vinegar. It’d have to be a stretchydressy mind, what with those crisps. Or enjoying an aimless bike ride in the countryside, not a care in the world. Or those hip young guys at the beach, exclaiming what-a-blinder-of-a-day-it’s-just-like being-at-the-Costa-del-Sol-innit-mate? Spring also brings with it the stress of choice. There’s that peer pressure to join friends for fun in the sun. And your own internal voice nagging you to tidy up the garden. When you’d really much rather potter around inside with your iPad, indulge in a little on-line shopping, listen to some music, or browse potential holiday destinations (where you’ll also end up sitting in the sun).
Come on, children, go play in the garden
Meanwhile you’re continually having to badger the kids to go outside and play, rather than waste their day behind a screen. It’s incredibly stressful, spring. Far too complicated, if you ask me. Give me summer with its 30-degree heat, time off and a swimming pool, OR give me winter. But definitely not this springdressy, which is either too cold, too old, too short, or else gathering mothballs in a carrier bag in a corner of the loft. Do you have any idea just how wonderful it is to admire the crocuses from your living room window by the way? So, toss me another mini chocolate egg, love. And make it a praline one this time. Now that’s what I call spring – stress free, on the sofa with your iPad and your 5th mini egg.